As I was deep in meditation, I went to check on my heart. At a crossroads in life, with one version of the relationship ending, and a desire for a new version to breakthrough. I had become co-dependent, and somehow lost my individuality along the way. I felt so afraid to let go, because I couldn’t control what the outcome or repercussions were going to be. I never had loved someone so deeply – yet I knew being afraid of losing that love, was not the answer.
As I sat with my heart, I entered to see how she was doing. I saw him and I holding hands and dancing. Singing, in love, joyful. My mind started to take over, as I wondered if I should open the door to my heart to let him go. Was it time to end such a beautiful chapter? As my mental mind contemplated, I realized the first lesson.
Holding on to this, was a form of control. Love does not force, it allows. It lets go of what YOU NEED, and honors and respects what the other needs equally.
So I made the decision to walk to the door of my heart, and from a place of love I opened it to see what would happen. Knowing that free will is the only way for true love to exist.
What happened next, surprised me. It was not an option I contemplated in my limited mental capacity. As his soul moved towards the door, he looked at me with compassion and love. His energy split into two, half staying in my heart, and half returning to his own. In that moment, I realized the second lesson.
Love does not have constraints, it is infinite. Love can exist in many forms, and what was needed right now, was to allow some of that love to return to his own being. It doesn’t change the love that exists between us, and our experience wasn’t any lesser because he was choosing to reclaim some of his own self love.
I started to have a new understanding of what love meant. Love is the driving force between all things, it’s what keeps us inspired, joyful, and grateful for the life that we are living. And it comes from freedom, allowing, and trusting.
I stood in the chamber of my heart, feeling grateful for the lessons I just witnessed. I was so afraid to let go, because in my mind letting go, meant it was going to leave entirely. But NOTHING can take away the memories, the compassion, the small moments where you felt seen and understood. The growth, the passion, the laughter. All the moments that exist between us, and us alone. And letting go does not mean the future is set in stone. But when two hearts become enmeshed, sometimes there needs to be a return to self. When we give too much, sometimes we need to take back in order to become balanced. This equilibrium is what creates a healthy foundation. The third lesson became clear.
Letting go is not losing, it is one of the greatest forms of love you can offer another. An act of selflessness, to support what the one you love most needs. Choosing to not take it personal, but trusting the soul of the one you love so dearly.
As we have heard so many times – “If you love something, set it free. If it comes back, it’s yours. If not, is was never meant to be.”